Thursday, October 11, 2012

What is your purpose?

Something makes me come back to the frills even after a period of hiatus. Something in it beckons me again and again, and while the thought of eventually growing too old to pull the style off doesn't horrify me, it certainly irritates me. Why do I love it even when my closet isn't one of those that are full to bursting and I don't spend every waking hour wearing it?

What initially drew me in was the quintessential girliness, it was the complete opposite of what I'd been wearing, which is probably one of the reasons why I was especially fascinated with Sweet Lolita. The pastels, bows, flowers and lace were an unabashed declaration of princess-like femininity in its most stereotypical sense, and it offered me a wonderful alternative after clothing myself in goth-style for such a long time. Suddenly I found myself "thinking pink" and instead of always picking something red or black, I would go for the colours more suitable to my new style. I guess it was a time of transition of some kind, maybe even a slight rebellion against growing up. I've been an "all-at-once" -kind of chameleon with plenty of things, and this was no exception.

After finding the gothic colour-schemes again later, the style has grown on me in a more mellow and less "radical" way. It's still a kind of an imaginary world -bubble that I share with likeminded individuals, but it seems to come more naturally these days. I've always had plenty of girls I like in the Lolita-circles, but only some I could've called actual friends. That changed when I became more active in my local community a few years ago, meeting people whose company I enjoy in and out of the style. That, I think, also keeps up my interest in wearing Lolita and inspires me.

Like many of you, I was also a bit of a tomboy growing up, and often, instead of being the princess, I opted for being either the wicked witch or even the prince. Certainly I had some dresses for special occasions and I would play faerie/mermaid stuff as eagerly as I would play gangsters or Tarzan, but I guess I was never a very girly girl. I was also a bit of a pushover when I was smaller, so I would let my super-girly friends have the pretty dresses and play the prince instead, when it came to princess-dressup. So this might be my way of taking back what was stolen, haha!

Me, I think at the age of 3 or 4. That Luke Skywalker hair
and spiffing flowery dress, not to mention funny teeth!

Lolita doesn't only make me feel pretty, it seems to suit me far better than any other style. I'm relatively short (just under 5'2) and my features are somewhat youthful and round, and I still get that cheerful feeling of accomplishment after putting together an attractive coord. The way the hem spreads out on top of the petticoat, the way headwear adds that special finish and the way I completely transform from my normal, frumpy appearance is magical every time.

That's a feeling worth holding on to.

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